I DON’T WANT TO BE A PIANO!

Our family invented some pretty crazy ways to entertain ourselves. Friends who visited us throughout the years went away thinking that either we were crazy or they adored us. After Matt and Jenny had been married for a while, and Jenny developed a true picture of the Heldmans, one of her comments was, “You Heldmans, you’re self entertaining.”

One of the activities we used to engage in took place in the car when all seven of us were scrunched together. Anyway you look at it, even though the front seats of cars back then had room for three, we were tightly packed when we went anywhere. This, of course, became more interesting as the kids got…larger…with age. The stories surrounding our car experiences would in themselves be a separate volume!

Since we were a singing and harmonizing family, we did a lot of it. I’m not sure how it all came about, but on one particular day we invented something new on our way down to the Museum of Science and Industry in Chicago. We all decided that we would be an instrument and then perform a number as we drove. One person was a clarinet, one a trombone, and someone was a violin, etc. I do remember that Angela’s designated instrument was a piano.

We started to sing and “play our instruments” and it actually sounded pretty good, given the fact that we were basically goofing off. The whole family could harmonize so we performed in four parts in between the laughter. After a while, it became obvious that Angela was losing interest. She said she didn’t want to do it anymore. I tried to encourage her by saying, “But, Angela, every band needs a piano!” Her response was, “But, Mom, I don’t want to be a piano!” So we switched around, each one taking a different instrument or inventing new ones and on we went downtown.

I could never shake her words. Part of the time, it reminded me of the passage in the Bible where it tells us that if the whole body were an eye, how would we hear or if the whole were hearing, how would we be able to smell things? It was a picture of being part of the body of Christ, no matter what that part was, and realizing the importance of that part.

Yet, it spoke something else to me. I realized, not then, but later, that kids are so different, even when they come from the same family. I think it’s important to teach your children how to be “a piano” just in case; but more crucial is the task of using wisdom in finding “the instrument” they want to be and are good at and hope to master. I did not do a very good job on this subject, I think because our kids were close together and it was just about all I could do to wash tons of clothes and register the five of them at three different schools and figure out a way for them to get a photo packet that was not too expensive!

Knowing what I do now, it is clear that if you are aware of the task of helping your kids find their niche, you can weave it into the clothes washing and the rest of the busy family life. It is a priority.

You know…I freely admit that I fell short on this. I’m sharing it with you so that you can catch it before it’s too late.