SPEAK EVIL OF NO MAN

“Set a watch before my mouth. Keep the door of my lips.” Psalm 141:3

It’s pretty plain. We are not supposed to be speaking evil of anyone. The secret to peace in relationships is found in this short verse. Not just the relationship between you and another, but as it affects everyone in fair sized circle about you. Proverbs 17:9 says, “He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.” This topic includes whole families, husbands and wives, sisters, brothers, church members, fellow employees, and any other interpersonal relationships.

Evidently, our words and their consequences are important to God for His Word is full of admonition and even warning on the subject. Do a study on “mouth” and “lips” and “talebearer,” etc. If we latch on to even one of these verses with the intent of obedience to the Lord, situations would change.

If you have sat cross legged on your bed, face to face with a friend or sister or parent, and told them about what a mutual friend or relative did or said, you were out of line. If your relating of what happened to you changes the opinion of that other person, it is wrong. I am learning to say nothing of my opinions on people and even some situations because I realize that my listener could possibly like a person who irritates me and maybe even be blessed by them. My listener might like a certain song or a speaker that bothers me and my “gossip” could play a part in quenching what the Spirit may want to do in his or her life.

There has been a bit of cogitating on my part as to how far this “speaking evil of no man” goes. Does it include government officials that I just can’t stand? Can I “go off” on them and still keep the intent of this verse? And what exactly does the word “evil” mean in this context?  My pondering the passage has made a change in my way of speaking. I’ve decided that I would rather fault on the side of not speaking ill in any form, about any person. In so doing, it has helped me to adhere to another directive from the Lord to “let my words be few.” I haven’t mastered the “few” part, but I can honestly say that I am least at a “fewer” level.

In some situations, the actions of another must be discussed. If you are a manager, and experiencing trouble with an employee, it may mean talking things through with your boss.  Even then, there is a way to confer without the tone of “speaking evil.” A former boss and I had an understanding that solved this issue for us. We had a limit of three sentences when speaking about a person in a difficult situation.

If you want to be sensitive to God’s wishes in this matter, you will find ways to make it happen in your life. Ask a friend, a spouse, a sibling, to hold you accountable…and even join you in this quest. We’ve got to stop gossiping. We’ve got to stop chatting about each other and others and situations. I receive a great deal of joy and satisfaction when I know something and choose to be silent rather than telling what I know. Who am I, anyway, that I can speak evil about anyone else?